Ashley Graham Plus Size Model

Skip over certain segments if you find the images offensive, but the message is a good one.  I so wish I'd had this confidence 40 years ago!

http://news.yahoo.com/katie-couric-talks-to-plus-size-model-ashley-graham-from-sports-illustrated-ad-164742765.html

A New Bed Design

Have you ever had a crazy idea and then discovered you weren't the first one to come up with it?

I sleep on an unopened futon.  I used to sleep on the couch, but I replaced the couch with a futon.  The futon does afford a guest bed in the slight chance someone wants to come see me.  Seriously, there are now three futons in my home and the Winnebago has a great bed, plus a futon type couch.  I'm getting ready for the gathering, but in the meantime, I'm thinking of one more bed design.

There are posturepedic, tempur-pedic, and sleep number beds, but I'm thinking more like some sort of rotisserie idea.  I'm trying to age gracefully, but I've recently become aware of one more odd fact of growing older.  I sleep primarily on my left side, and suddenly I've become aware of some odd tissue displacement.  Gravity is once again the culprit, I'm guessing.  I can't do the upside down bat style sleeping and we all know daily that gravity is always pulling us toward the ground, so here's an idea.

Some sort of sleeping bag style hammock.  It would have to zip or have straps; otherwise, you'd fall out when it rotated through the night.  No crazy high speed stuff, just a way to literally sleep on air without having any side down for too long.  It would be similar to sleeping in space.  I remember seeing the astronauts floating around in the old documentaries showing how they prepared themselves to go into space and get used to less gravity.

I knew this was not a completely ludicrous idea, so I googled . . . Someone else has given this serious thought, as well; although this design calls for more in the research and development department.

Amazing Discovery

I like to make people happy.  I'm not talking about compromising my spiritual values, at all, but I like to go the extra mile.  I enjoy smiling and I like to see other people smile!  The personal touch is important, and to offer something extra is meaningful . . . I've finally realized, however; my version of meaningful, my idea of the extra mile, is not always appreciated by the subject of my effort.

Let me share what I have discovered.  All the people in your life who verbalized disappointment in your extra effort.  Lighten up the effort!  They will stop telling you what else you should do.  It's amazing.  As long as I was willing to keep trying a little harder, they were willing to keep raising the bar and moving the hoop.  Once I shrugged my shoulders and "sat down" so to speak, everything changed.  It's truly been a life changing discovery.

I have more time, less stress, and no expectation to be appreciated by others!  I can still be pleasant to all these people and simply offer a reasonable effort.  I even assure myself that my extra effort just made them feel inadequate . . . LOL.  My life changed when I realized everything I do, I do unto Abba; that is absolutely everything.  He doesn't believe in waste; not time and certainly not effort.  I've cleaned up my act.  Our Heavenly Father is much more appreciative than people, I've noticed!  Since Messiah is Torah, his expectations are clear and the bar is never raised . . . or lowered.

Oh, what a seriously happy day that was, when I realized some people are simply never satisfied, and some people are especially difficult to please, when they see you're willing to keep aiming higher.  Then one day, I realized, kindness to people is a byproduct of my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  The extra mile is about following Messiah, and sometimes after that second mile, it's time to hand their pack, back to them and realize we're no longer heading the same direction.  That's not mean, that's just moving on.

In speaking with my niece the other day, I jokingly mentioned this, and shared, "Nobody seems any more dissatisfied than they were when I was trying so hard!"

Weight - a Heavy Subject

If anyone has seen any of my videos, you already know, I'm not petite.  I was speaking to a friend a couple of weeks ago and naturally the subject of weight came up.  She said she'd like to lose about 20 pounds.  I said I had about 10 I'd like to get rid of.  I'm sure pound for pound and inch for inch, I'm fuller figured than she is, but I have a new method that has worked for me for the past seven years.

I have between ten and twenty pounds that naturally come and go with the seasons and the loss of that weight requires very little obsessing.  The weight shifts with the seasons so it seems a rather natural sliding scale that really doesn't alter my appearance dramatically.  At this point in life, I'm going more by the mirror than by the scales.  I'm used to my body by now, and realize there is a size on both ends of the spectrum in which I simply cannot attain and remain healthy.   I've also realized, as I'm sure most women have.  Our weight comes and goes in specific areas on our body.

With a healthy diet and good exercise, I am still not a small woman.  I'm sure I could do some specifics for toning, but to be honest, I don't care enough to do it.  I want to maintain an active homesteading lifestyle and keep my body functioning well.  My diet and activity level are more important than the scales.  In mentioning how our weight drops or accumulates specifically on our body also should determine what size we feel best about ourselves.  I should want to lose more than 10 pounds, but then my weight becomes my focus and I look like my caricature.  Both of which are undesirable!


I've made a god out of my body before and not only is it idolatry, it isn't healthy.  We weren't all made to be the same size and even when I'm underweight, which I did once . . . my body is not perfectly proportioned.  Just as gluttony is a sin, so is vanity.  Probably ten years ago, I realized, I should have appreciated my body in my 20s and 30s instead of abusing it for appearance.  There's also the regretful wish of . . . I wish I was the size I was when I used to think I was fat.

Being healthy is not a number on the scales, it's portion and purity that makes the difference.  Our bodies were not created to utilize processed foods, fast foods, and preservatives, or eat unclean animals.  What the body cannot utilize or process through digestion gets stored in cells that have little purpose . . . fat cells.   It's no coincidence that Type II diabetes has increased dramatically at the same time chemical sweeteners have been added to much of the food supply.

Just about anyone who is over their "correct weight," not ideal weight, but correct weight according to height and build, will drop 10 pounds in about a month by doing the following.  Increase water intake by 16 - 32 ounces a day.  Prepare all meals at home.   Have fresh vegetables for between meal snacks.  Corn, peas, and potatoes do not count as vegetables . . . they are starch.  Reduce sedentary time by 20 minutes a day.  You don't have to join a gym or force yourself to walk so many blocks, just make a point to not spend so much time sitting or laying as the case may be.  Basically, for most of us, that means turn off the TV, lay down the smart technology or walk away from the computer and do something that requires standing or moving something besides our hands . . .

A Love/Hate Relationship

As we age, many of us discover our love/hate relationship with gravity.  Oh, of course, we like to keep both feet on the ground, but . . . gravity has a pull on the rest of our body as well.  As I survey this "earthly ensemble" it seems no part of my body is where our Creator first created it to be.

Dealing with gravity seems to be a give and take situation.

I used to be self-conscious about a round or oval face.  Thanks to gravity, my cheek bones have a more chiseled appearance, my face seems thinner, but there's the whole jowls thing now going on at my jawline.  As for the chin and neck thing, I look in the mirror and see my grandma looking back.  I've wondered if I began sleeping like a bat . . . upside down, if my body would sort of balance out on the gravity effect.

Moving right along the topography of this "dust" I call a body.  I have discovered two positive things from the effect of gravity on breasts.  I made a friend at Her Room and that midriff bulge I was concerned about in my early 30s is now completely concealed by sagging breasts.  WIN/WIN!  As a matter of fact, a fuller waistline is concealed and camouflaged by a sagging bosom, as well.  Who knew all the perks of the lack of perkiness?

There is also a new reality in weight management.  Too much weight loss accentuates the effect of gravity on loose skin.  That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!  I can't say with certainty that gravity affects us internally; but age, time and childbirth certainly seem to have left an impact on muscle tone and bladder resilience.  In my younger days, working in long term care, I apparently thought, it all just hit over night.  Ah, the twenties are such a time of oblivious cluelessness.

Moving right along, or down, I have to say, as full figured as I am, I do not have cankles, but my behind is no longer where it once was.  My tuchus is not yet directly behind my knees, as of yet, but . . . on to my ankles because; I have skinny ankles.  The only thing on me that is skinny, so I like to mention them at every opportunity.  One of my daughters and a few grandchildren refer to my "grandma chicken legs."  Whatever that means . . .  Meanwhile my feet don't look too bad for holding all this up and keeping me "fastened" to the sod for the time being.

I used to stand on my head, every year on my birthday, just to know I still could . . . in case I ever wanted to give that "bat sleeping style" a try.  I discovered on my 46th birthday, 45 was the last year for that!  I also discovered in that same gymnastic attempt, sleeping inverted would not work.  It is indeed possible for breast tissue to compress one's throat and constrict breathing . . .

I'm going to do everything in my power, to embrace this right of passage and be thankful in all things including gravity.  For now, it's keeping me grounded and stable!  Nobody wants to imagine all this floating in the atmosphere, overhead!  The love/hate relationship continues.

A Mouse!

I told a friend about my very unnerving experience awhile back and she said, "Oh you should write about it!"  I was a bit shy about the entire ordeal, until it almost happened again, and now I won't get another good night's sleep until I warn others.

A couple of weeks ago, I was busy about the house doing, I don't know what, probably writing or something, when I headed to "the powder room."  Okay, to put it bluntly, I had to pee and I can't really say whether it's age or MS, but it seems like I get almost a 5 second warning between, I think I gotta go and . . . yep, sure did!  So, I don't usually take in the scenery, as I become a woman with a serious destination and no time to spare.

I zipped into the master bathroom, sat down, and quickly took care of business.  As I got up, getting my attire back together I noticed in my peripheral vision, something moving in the toilet . . . It was a mouse.  In that split second a multitude of thoughts all collided in my mind.  First the reality of 'I just peed on a mouse' Second, I said a prayer!  That's right, I thanked our Heavenly Father that it was only a mouse and not a snake.  We've all seen that social media image of the snake lurking in the bottom of the bowl . . . Since I wasn't dressed to run, I thought 'FLUSH.'

Next, yet simultaneously, I thought I was so glad I'd already peed, because if I'd noticed him first, I'm not sure how all that would have turned out.  Then, I wondered how he got there, when, a distant memory of being in a church bathroom as a kid of about 5, came vividly to mind.  The same thing had happened, only then I ran to get help!  Aunt Ethel came to my rescue.  I thought of Aunt Ethel, with her older lady math teacher suit and those lace up high heeled shoes just calmly flushing that varmint down the drain.

Needless to say, since that event, I no longer just run in and sat down.  I even make a point of heading to the bathroom before I think I have to go, just in case . . . I want time to survey the situation.  It's also changed my habits at night.  You know how you get used to where everything is and how many steps it is between your bed and the bathroom, without even thinking about it or turning on the light?  Well, no more!  I do not even think about sitting down in a dark bathroom.  The other night proved the new extra precaution, to be a good thing.  Here I am, in the main bathroom, and there's a mouse again in the toilet.  What's with this?

I can't figure out how they get there, if they are swimming up from somewhere or falling in from somewhere else.  Since I've not yet had my camera with me at the time, I don't have a meme or an image for social media.  If only I were a teen aged girl alway prepared to take a selfie in the bathroom mirror, I'd have record of one of those varmints.  We've all heard the old cliche, "Look before you leap."  Well I have a new one, "Look before you sit!"

The Transition

I'm feeling a big change coming . . . I mean big!  I'm not exactly sure what, but I believe it's going to be good.  I believe the change is coming from our Heavenly Father, and we're told every good and perfect gift comes from Him, so . . . but the transition means change, and change is not always easy.  Having declared war on ancient dust bunnies a few weeks ago, and now heading into canning season, I'm excited.  I'm preparing for Shemitah, which means I've actually purchased more canning jars . . .

With this positive direction, there have been a few hurdles, but nothing our Creator can't handle!  It's interesting with G-d, as He opens one door, often another one closes.  As a multi-tasker, that hasn't always been easy for me to accept, but in the past few years, He's really given a comfort in that, and when I'm paying attention, He has actually given warning that a door will close.  I stopped trying to keep my foot in those closing doors, and for the most part, I don't bruise my spiritual knuckles trying to make doors out of brick walls.

Several months ago in a conversation with a friend, I spoke of events unfolding that would be great and terrible.  I believe we are beginning to see those events and the momentum both ways will increase.  I feel myself moving into the place I knew YHWH would bring me.  The other night, the heaviness of isolation was nearly overwhelming, but Y'hshuwah assured me, I am not alone.  I'm where I'm supposed to be in Him.  I'm not claiming perfection at all!  There were just several things last week that came from all different directions, really leaving me feeling quite shaken.

As I read the usual comments of social media as to how to overcome, I just wasn't comforted.  However, everytime I opened my Bible or either of my two favorite devotion books; there was a passage that precisely addressed the situation.  It seems often, so many people appear to have it so together, while I still feel a bit scattered.  I am grateful, though; to have the wholeness and healing that I see the whole scattered picture.  The pieces may not all be in place yet, but I can see them, and I can see them coming together by the grace and Hand of El Shaddai!

As I spent much of this week in the garden and canning, I felt a sermon of preparation in the works.  I heard the passage "occupy until I return."  With that, of course, also the parable of the virgins, wise and foolish.  Sometimes we just can't see the whole picture in the same view.   I have a canning pictorial for a parable.

Through the process of preparation everything stacked in the drainer is "all over the kitchen" and it could be easy to lose sight of the goal or even wonder if I'm supposed to be doing what I'm doing, but . . . 

when I see this, I am assured that this part of my Master's plan.